Did you ever pass up a chance to try out for something, because you didn’t feel you had the ability or talent to succeed?  As a child, this misapprehension held me back a couple times, only to make me realize that the people who put themselves out there, at least had the chance to succeed.  And for those who did, I noticed with some - that their performance was not as great as I had thought it had to be anyway.  Yet they reaped the reward just because they were courageous enough to try.  You know the old saying,” You can’t win the lotto if you don’t buy a ticket.” 

A common misconception, for many people, is that in order to be successful at something, they to have an inborn talent or be gifted in a certain area.  However, research indicates that is not necessarily the case.  In Psychologist Dr. Lynn Johnson’s article entitled, “Fixed Or Growth Attitude”, he presents the findings of psychologist Carol Dweck, about people who have either a fixed attitude or a growth attitude regarding themselves.  

The “fixed” attitude person believes that we can improve our talents but we should hide our weaknesses. That person believes that one should skip opportunities if they would expose a weakness. The “fixed” attitude makes one highly embarrassed when one is wrong.
The “growth” attitude person believes that opportunities should be seized because not only might they bring success, but they are also situations where one will grow and develop. What if they are wrong? They are curious about what they missed and what they can learn from the mistake. Failure to the “growth” person is an opportunity to learn. Growth people are eager to fail more quickly so they can learn more thoroughly..  

Further in the article, Dr. Johnson refers to the findings of Professor K. Anders Ericcson, from  Florida State University, who studied highly successful people in music, art, medicine, law, and sports, and is known as “The Expert on Experts.”  

To almost everyone’s surprise, he found that talent didn’t make any difference. He found some talented persons went on to great success and others did not. He also learned that some persons without any measurable talent when young went on to be significant experts, champions, and top performers. The only thing that mattered was how they practiced.
Successful people tended to practice much more than those who didn’t succeed. He found, for example, that the best musicians had practiced around 10,000 hours by the time they were twenty years old. The good musicians had practiced around 2,000 hours. So successes out-practice the not-so- successful people by a five to one ratio.

Second, the successful persons were focused on deliberate practice. What that means is they sought out the best coaches and teachers and worked very hard to have the best performance possible. They work hard at improving and they enjoy seeing themselves get better.


There are many talented people who do not have the motivation or drive to develop their potential, while some, perhaps not as gifted, have a strong urge to work hard and practice their skills, despite many challenges and failures. That being said, instead of remaining stagnant, we all can develop untapped resources of potential and growth. It certainly behooves us to seek out the right mentors, coaches and teachers and find a purpose that aligns with our missions.  With no stone unturned, our effort, persistence and practice may pay off in the long run.  

How do we perceive our life’s experiences?  Perhaps some are grand and expansive, so that we want them to stick around forever.  Other times our experiences may be restrictive and challenging, but if we “ride the wave” - these lessons provide us with a way to grow.  What ever type of occurrences are presented to us, a positive mindset will enhance our love of life.  Furthermore, we can discover a way to enhance our outlook and lives, by participating in the joy of doing the things we love to do.  If we are able to forge a way to nurture ourselves and nourish our inner child - so dear to us, we can find fulfillment and greater appreciation for what turns up each day.  If we trying our very best to be as kind and helpful as we can to help others, we must make sure that our good deeds do not fall short when it comes to improving our lives.

Some people work 40, 50 even 80 hours per week, to earn a livelihood and/or raise up a family, or support some other endeavor. It seems like there is not much time or energy to recharge our batteries, relax and make sure we are rewarded for the work we have done.  What if we made up our minds to look forward to participating in some things that truly motivates and gives us a lift.  Some of us may have an interest in a certain form of exercise or sporting activity. Perhaps reading, writing, singing, music, art, dance, cooking, or any other kind of creative outlet, would add flavor to our lives.  We all have different activities that call us if we take the time to tune in.  These kinds of activities  promote balance, enthusiasm and excitement in our lives.  Suddenly, the long list of responsibilities looks different to us up, and we find each part of out day gratifying,  

If we can take some time to sit in a quiet place and ponder what would fill our heart with joy and nourish our souls, then we can move forward with a plan, so that when achieved, positivity and love can flow into all areas of our lives and relationships to make our days a symphony of song and delight - may our days be blessed. 

Self undoing or forward moving - which would you choose?  If we are our own best friend, most likely we would go with the latter.  A good start is to get in touch with what we truly desire, and move forward with a mission, goals and plan of action. Anything opposing this endeavor can give us a clue to what's standing in our way.

Like perhaps self doubting and defeating thoughts and self criticism moving like arrows aiming at the heart of our being.  These thoughts may cajole us with comments like, "Those guys are so smart and together, I could never be that good, or achieve what they have."  Or perhaps we may hear, " I am not good, smart, cool, pretty, intelligent enough."  Believe it or not, these are self negating thoughts many of us share.  They pop into our minds and we don't even wonder how they got there. We just believe them more than we believe in ourselves.

So when negative self talk shows up at our door, we don’t have to join these guys or attend their party.  If we let them be and move on, our focus can be on being the best we can be, and we can conquer by action. Our part is to do the work. Our effort is our only concern.  The results is not our department.  So let’s tackle whatever we wish and enjoy the journey as well.